Tuesday, September 05, 2006

The Gangster is a pillar of the community.

A little background, The gangster runs a good portion of his limousine business out of his home. This is good for him but frequently irritates the neighbors. 10 limo drivers showing up at 3am parking cars in the lawn, cleaning them out, of the beer bottles, coolers, party hats, bras, etc. Of course there’s always a little beer and booze left over in most of the car’s so there is almost always a little late night impromptu party.

So the Gangster is always looking to be extra nice to his neighbors. He’ll get them tickets to a local game or concert, have deli tray’s delivered if he knows there having a party, flowers for all the women’s birthdays, etc, etc, etc.


Now yesterday was a little bit different.

I was over at Gangster central (His house) around 9:30 in the morning and we were having a coffee going over some paperwork and as we walk out front we see his neighbor across the street having what looks like an argument with a house painter.

This particular neighbor is actually pretty nice to the Gangster and she might even be a little sweet on him. The painter looks like, well a painter. Wearing cut off shorts and a white t-shirt all covered with paint and doesn’t look like he’s had a shower in a couple of days, of course no shave. He’s standing next to his beat up Toyota pick up with ladders all over the top of it. The neighbor is visibly shaken and about to be in tears.

The Gangster for all of his faults is a human being and is not going to allow anyone to get over on this woman.
As it turns out this painter was combing the neighbor hood knocking on doors a few days ago offering to paint houses for cash. His rap is that he is an out of town construction worker and the job he was on allegedly got put on hold for a week so he’s trying to making a little cash while he is waiting for it to start back up. The neighbor lady paid him $600 bucks up front and showed him the paint color she wanted. The guy was supposed to buy a particular tan color. Instead the scammer bought a bunch of batch paint (Batch paint is the left overs from all the paint that people haven’t picked up and it gets mixed together and sold for about four bucks a gallon.) This particular batch of batch paint is orange. It looks like someone took pumpkin orange and added a little white to it. It was ridicules!!!! And it is currently on about 25 percent of her house!!!!!!


The Gangster is not an especially big man. Maybe about 5’7” and he doesn’t have a muscular build but he carries himself with an air of authority. It just works for him.


I have to admit I don’t always see eye to eye with the Gangsters tactics but in this particular situation I couldn’t have been more happy/proud to be on his side. I have to admit he played the situation pretty well. He walks up and puts his hand softly on the shoulder of the sweet old lady and hunches his shoulders and head down so he’s just about eye level with her and truly was poring over her with a feeling that everything was going to be alright.


Here’s the sly part. He put his body just inside the painters comfort zone. The painter took a half step back and started sizing up the Gangster. The Gangster was saying something soothing to the sweet old lady and he was also eyeing up the painter. Then he looks over his shoulder just a little bit and gives me a quick look. That look meant for me to get my ass over there, I’ve seen the look before.


After maybe 45 seconds of listening to the painter pop off about how that was the paint she told him to get and “he wasn’t getting fucked on this job” and then out of nowhere the Gangster was done with this guy.


He moved fast enough so that the painter wasn’t getting away but not so fast as to startle his victim into a reaction. He grabbed the painters left arm with his left arm and took three big steps away from the sweet old lady. His right fist was full of the neck line of the painters shirt. He was clamping down on the painters arm hard enough so that the painter was squirming a bit. Then he looks at me and says “Get the plate”.


That meant I was to write down the guys license plate number. The gangster has friends!!!!! He’s never done it for anything I’ve personally been involved in but I know he knows some people that can run license plate numbers.

Then thru gritted teeth and squinting eyes, maybe 2 inches from the guys face the Gangster speaks….
“I know what you’re trying to pull. I know what you already spent and I want you to give her the money you have left, then I want you to leave.”

When the Gangster gets into this particular mode he just can’t be beaten. He carries himself with an attitude that you have no other option but to do what he wants. Sure as hell, the guy starts back pedaling. The guy digs into his pocket and pulls out what turns out to be $462 dollars and hands it to the Gangster.

The Gangster doesn’t exactly let the guy go but more or less puts him into the front seat of his little white Toyota and closes the door on him. Dam near on his foot.

EXIT BAD HOUSE PAINTER no further incident.

Then the Gangster does what really makes me proud. He gives the neighbor lady the $462 bucks and asks her when she needs the house painted by.
(Turns out she’s having some garden party and it needs to be done in 48 hours.)

So what are P.D. and I doing today.

You got it. Were painting a house…….

Crash Out!

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